How to Win Friends & Influence People

        In Shabbach MC we are assigned a book to read each month as well as completing a chapter summary. This month we are reading Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends & Influence People"   The first part of this book focuses on "three fundamental techniques in handling people." Don't criticize, condemn or complain, Give honest and sincere appreciation, Arouse in the other person an eager to want. 

        "Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person's precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment." Criticizing someone is easy but finding good in their fault can be difficult. We can often go about our day casting blame where we think blame is due. It is much easier to make someone else the cause for our pain then ourselves. Author Dale Carnegie touched on the subject by using Al Capone as an example. Al Capone said " I have spent the best part of my life giving people the lighter pleasures, helping them have a good time, and all I get is abuse." It was easier for Al Capone to blame other people for where he was than to see that he was his biggest enemy. Instead of looking for places to cast the blame this week try to focus on what you can fix in yourself, and/or find good in the person who, in your eyes, is to blame. 

      " We provide them with roast beef and potatoes to build energy, but we neglect to give them kind words of appreciation that would sing in their memories for years like the music of the morning stars." Are you spewing flattery or giving genuine appreciation? The definition of "flattery" is " excessive and insincere praise, that is given to further one's own interests." Are you saying nice things for your own selfish motives or are your intentions true? This week is a good week to focus on others; Seek after random acts of kindness as each day passes. Carpe Diem.

       " If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own." There are a lot of people who are only concerned with themselves.  Someone who can put aside their own selfish desires for others is admirable. Philippians 2:3 " Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves." Even if you don't agree with a point of view, its wise to be able to understand other prospectives. We spend enough time wrapped in our own busy lives but we MUST try to train ourselves to follow in His footsteps and we will discover a life of selflessness.

Have a blessed week,

Keyona

Verse of the week: Philippians 2:4 - Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Leadership

 Sight, voice, touch, smell, and hearing.  In order to create effective leadership one should be able to tap into these senses on a regular basis.  From the start we must have vision.  Without vision, your team and/or your youth group will drift away until there is nothing.  So, how do you see with the eyes of a leader?  I'm so glad you asked!  The Lord will provide vision and sometimes, that may come from another person.  Stick to your vision, even when those around may mock or disagree with it.

"People won't walk across the street to hear my voice but will come around the world to hear the gospel."  I have heard PG say this multiple times.  Its the God in you that makes the difference.  Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit."  God uses us to help others as long as we have an open mind and heart.  Proverbs 23:7 "As a man thinketh in his heart so is he" When we become praise focused we allow ourselves to speak power which could be monumental to one seeking direction.

In 1 Peter he says imitation of Christ requires walking in this world the way Jesus walked.  Its important to realize that God uses us to do His work.  When you are transparent with God and allow Him to touch your life it will become the reason you do what you do.  In doing this, you open yourself up to receive the healing God has for you.

What do you smell like?  Effective leaders hear things differently, talk differently, and think differently.  So again, what do you smell like?  When you are gone from a room does your scent linger?  Wherever we are we are leaving a trail, make sure yours is the fragrance of a King.

Leaders have a trained ear.  It doesn't just come one day.  When you hear the voice of the Lord, things change.  The closer you get, the clearer things become.  

I have heard of people that question His existence because the lack of one or more of these senses.  But this is the way the Lord communicates to His leaders.  He isn't missing or absent you just have to recognize the way He chooses to communicate with you.

Have a blessed week,

Keyona

Verse of the week: Hebrews 13:7 "Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith"