Thursday, August 2, 2012

A Father's Ark Revisited

After listening to the Father's Day podcast I was asked by a newly wed wife about what it means for the husband to be "the priest" & how she can help her husband to stay in that place. Below is my response & I thought it was good enough to make available to you! Here is goes: What does a Priest in a home look like? It looks like Jesus to His church. Let me give the details: The position of the husband in a marriage/home clearly defined: Ephesians 5:22, 28-31. "Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, even as Christ is head of the church; and he is the savior of the body. Therefore as the church is subject to Christ, so let wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wife as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it . . . So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church . . . For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh". Scriptures that deal with the husband as head of the house.  Genesis 3:16, says in part "her desire shall be to man". Ephesians 5:23, "husband is head of the wife";  I Tim. 2:11-12, "She shall have no dominion over a man".  HEAD does not mean master as in a master-slave relationship, nor does it mean a relationship like a general to a private in the army. It is more like a partnership where one is the leader, guide, director. His vote carries the majority because he is to be speaking on behalf of God, not personal ambition. The husband is to love his wife above all other human beings. Consider Eph. 5:25 and 28; and Col. 3:19. These passages teach that the husband is to be considerate and tender. The verses in Ephesians 5 teach that the husband is to cherish his wife. This means that she is to be treated with tenderness and affection. LOVE must be fed. His goal is to connect on an intimate level with her socially, mentally, verbally and physically.  I Peter 3:7, teaches that the husband is to honor his wife. You gave up your name to take his. Honor means that he should show you respect and this involves courtesy, consideration and emotional support. You wears his name and is to be viewed as part of his body. You are not perfect and he is aware of this. Do not expect perfection, but as Ephesians 4:32 teaches, "forbear one another". This means to be gentle toward each other. Control of temper, abstaining from physical violence and restraining a sharp tongue that makes one feel so inferior - are ways to demonstrate forbearance. I Timothy 5:8 - "But if any provide not for his own, especially for those of his own household, he hath denied the faith and is worse than an infidel". Marriage is a financial venture and the husband has a responsibility to finance or support or provide for his family. As a husband, his earnings are not his, but belong to his wife as well and children. I Timothy 3:3-5 speaks of ruling your own house. Now this discipline should be with love. Many times discipline is administered without love. This is such a big deal that elders and deacons aren't allowed to fulfill their calling, if their house is out of order. Ephesians 6:4, "Fathers provoke not your children to wrath", and again in Colossians 3:21, "Fathers provoke not your children to anger lest they be discouraged". The husband does not leave all the discipline up to his wife, but shares in the molding and direction of your children. A proper division of responsibility is not to say that the husband provides the living and the wife takes care of the house and children. The husband has duties even after his days work. The Christian father should set an example for his family as he earns a living, directs the household with concern for each member, and as he fulfills his role as head of the house. He should see to their spiritual development by the life he lives and the direction in which he leads his family. A wife is a part of his body - you are a part of each other. For this reason Paul said, "Love your wife". He didn't say, if you want to. As he loves you, you love yourself and are fulfilling the role that the Lord wanted he & you to have. The bottom line is he is the pastor and his family is the congregation. How can you as his wife help? Know your place & lovingly stay there whether he is everything listed or on his way. hope I helped